promiseoftin: (Merry Christmas)
[personal profile] promiseoftin
It's BEST OF 2012 TIME!!!! My annual music, film and TV bests won't be posted at PhantEye until Monday, so you guys are getting a sneak peek treat! Feel free to steal this survey for your own bests!


BEST ALBUM OF THE YEAR: Fun. - Some Nights
Unadulterated anthems of Generation Y. The best album of 2012, period.
BEST EP OF THE YEAR: Kate Nash - Death Proof
The cheeky songstress brings back riot grrl on this smashing little gift
BEST REISSUE: Rage Against the Machine - S/T
Still just as fierce and poignant as it was 20 years ago, now with bonus demos
MORE ADDICTIVE THAN CRACK! (aka best song of the year): Fun. - Carry On
Nate Ruess and Co. penned a perfectly hopeful fist-pumper for these hopeless times
MORE ANNOYING THAN CARROT TOP (aka worst song of the year): Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe
Hey, I just heard of you, and this is crazy, but you're annoying as fuck. Disappear, maybe?
BEST SURPRISINGLY GOOD ALBUM: Deerhoof - Breakup Song
Let's face it: Deerhoof are WEIRD. But this one's their most accessible and enjoyable yet.
BEST ALBUM NO ONE HEARD: Abandoned Pools - Sublime Currency
This lovely, heartfelt comeback album by former Eel Tommy Walter weaves electronics and acoustics sublimely
CRITICS’ FAVORITE ALBUM TO JACK OFF TO: Tame Impala - Lonerism
I wish I could snark on them ("Lame" Impala, anyone?), but honestly, this swirling trip of an album was too good
BEST REASON TO RAID YOUR PARENTS’ CD COLLECTION: Beach Boys - That's Why God Made the Radio
Hawthorne's finest release their first original album in 20 years and blow away most of the muck that's on the radio today
BEST REASON TO RAID YOUR YOUNGER SIBLING’S CD COLLECTION, THEN DESTROY IT: Christina Aguilera - Lotus
This turd of a record should have the diva crawling back into a fetal position
BEST MUSIC VIDEO: Benjamin Gibbard - Teardrop Windows
The Death Cab for Cutie front man posing as a badass results in unintentional warm fuzzies
BEST LYRICS: "The rib is the shell and the heart is the yolk/And i just made a meal for us both to choke on (Fiona Apple - Every Single Night)
Welcome back, you wascally siren, you!
BEST (CHEEKY) LYRICS: Snoop Dogg's (Lion's?) remake of his Drop It Like It's Hot for Hot Pockets
Because nothing's as gangsta as a microwavable snack
THE "DON’T TELL MY COOL HIPSTER FRIENDS I LIKE THIS ALBUM" AWARD: Deadmau5 - >Album Title Goes Here<
Double dose of the embarrassment thanks to Gerard Way popping up on "Professional Griefers."
THE "DON’T TELL MY COOL HIPSTER FRIENDS I LIKE THIS SONG" AWARD: Mumford & Sons - I Will Wait
Cos nothing is more shameful in hipsterdom than digging a band of hipsters who sold out, aye?
BEST LIVE ACT: Grouplove
It's like they took everyone to their best friend's house for a slumber party pillow fight!
BEST EMERGING BAND: Lord Huron
Bucolic, dreamy folk from the urban enclave of Silver Lake
BEST EMERGING ARTIST: Miguel
This R&B sensation melds old-school jamming with neo-soul that'll appeal to practically everyone
BEST COMEBACK: Fiona Apple
Because we all needed that extra dose of crazy infused into our lives
LEAST WELCOMED COMEBACK: Chris Brown
There's nothing funny about a woman beater being hailed for his mediocre music. Added sadness that Rihanna got sucked back into a friendship with him.
THE "OMG I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABIES" AWARD (MALE): Nate Ruess of Fun.
From his song narratives, he sounds like he'd be a fun date
THE "OMG I WANNA ADOPT A BABY WITH YOU" AWARD (FEMALE): Nicole Fiorentino of Smashing Pumpkins
I'd cross an Oceania to hang out with her!
THE "HUH, ACTORS CAN SING" AWARD: Anne Hathaway
The people will be singing along with Catwoman in next month's "Les Miserables"
THE "OH, WAIT, I TAKE THAT BACK. ACTORS CAN’T SING" AWARD: Ty Burrell
Love you, Phil Dunphy, but that ad in which you sing off-key doesn't do much for the cause
MUSIC-RELATED AWESOMENESS I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IN 2013: Green Day touring after Billie Joe Armstrong gets sober, the fully reunited Queens of the Stone Age with Dave Grohl on drums



Please note: This list might be premature, as I've not yet seen "The Hobbit," "Life of Pi" and other essentials
BEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR: Cloud Atlas
Bewildering, hard to follow but astoundingly lovely
"WE WASTED MONEY THAT COULD HAVE FED A STARVING THIRD WORLD NATION TO MAKE THIS HORRIBLE FILM" AWARD: Battleship
Hopefully the trend of dramatizing board games is sunk
WORST (CHEAPLY MADE) FILM: Paranormal Activity 4
Stop resurrecting this now-cliche series, thanks.
BEST COMEDY: 21 Jump Street
Channing Tatum proves he's not just an absolutely gorgeous beefcake. He's a funny, absolutely gorgeous beefcake!
BEST ACTOR: Philip Seymour Hoffman - The Master
Talk about a masterful performance - but we expect nothing less from this genius
BEST ACTRESS: Amy Adams - The Master and On the Road
Unflinching, unrefined, unparalleled talent
BEST COMEBACK: Stephen Chbosky
The "Perks of Being a Wallflower" author sort of dropped out of the public eye for over a decade, until he penned and directed the whimsical, exhilarating film adaptation of his beloved book
THE "GO AWAY AND DON'T COME BACK" AWARD: unclever horror films
"Cabin in the Woods" changed the game. All other horror flicks need to up the ante now.
BEST SOUNDTRACK: The Perks of Being a Wallflower
The one place where the Smiths reunited, kinda
BEST SPECIAL EFFECTS: Cloud Atlas
Stunning sets and the metamorphosis of the actors from male to female puts this flick above the rest
BEST BREAKOUT PERFORMANCE (MALE): Ezra Miller
He might be below average in "The Perks of Being a Wallflower," but he's an above-average thespian
BEST BREAKOUT PERFORMANCE (FEMALE): Doona Bae
This clone in "Cloud Atlas" truly stood out
CRITICS’ FAVORITE FILM TO JACK OFF TO: Lincoln
Honestly, I prefer my Abe hunting vampires
BEST MOVIE NO ONE SAW: On the Road
An amped-up retelling of the Kerouac classic, now with more Bella Swan!
GREATEST GEEK-OUT MOMENT: The Avengers chomping down on shwarama after the big fight
LAMEST GEEK-OUT MOMENT: (SPOILER ALERT) The big fight at the end of "Breaking Dawn: Part II" was just a vision!
THE "OMG I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABIES" AWARD (MALE): Jim Sturgess
Not gonna lie: He looks hot as a Korean guy
THE "OMG I WANNA ADOPT A BABY WITH YOU" AWARD (FEMALE): Emma Watson
Being her pal would make me feel infinite
MOVIE-RELATED AWESOMENESS I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IN 2013: The Desolation of Smaug, the Lone Ranger, Seth MacFarlane hosting the Oscars



BEST NEW COMEDY: the Mindy Project
Yes, Mindy, we're all hanging out, but WITH you this time!
BEST NEW DRAMA: Revolution
JJ Adams can do no wrong. Not too shabby that Jon Favreau exec produces, too!
OVERALL BEST COMEDY: Modern Family
Oh, those dorky Dunphies!
OVERALL BEST DRAMA: Revolution
Excellent popcorn entertainment for the small screen
BEST REALITY SHOW: Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition
Inspiring. Wish I had the fortitude to go on a hundred-mile bike ride!
CRITICS’ FAVORITE SHOW TO JACK OFF TO: Homeland
War, what is it good for? A ton of Emmys!
BEST ACTOR, COMEDY: Jim Parsons - Big Bang Theory
this egghead excels
BEST ACTOR, DRAMA: Giancarlo Esposito - Revolution
From "Breaking Bad" to becoming a big bad on NBC. Not bad at all!
BEST ACTRESS, COMEDY: Aubrey Plaza - Parks and Recreation
the bitch is back and better than ever!
BEST ACTRESS, DRAMA: Cote de Pablo - NCIS
Her Ziva is witty yet vulnerable, especially up against her male cohorts
THE "OMG I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABIES" AWARD (MALE): Billy Burke
Miles Matheson is a dreamboat renegade
THE "OMG I WANNA ADOPT A BABY WITH YOU" AWARD (FEMALE): Rashida Jones
We could totally take our bebe to the Park
MOST SHOCKING REVELATION: Sons of Anarchy's Johnny Lewis really led an anarchic life.
Frightening to hear of his murder-suicide episode that ended him at 28.
GUILTY PLEASURE SHOW: Storage Wars
It's like Antique Roadshow on steroids!
BEST COMEBACK: Arrested Development
We really always will have the banana stand!
LEAST WELCOMED COMEBACK: Steve-o
this Jackass is now hosting the dumbass "Killer Karaoke"
TV-RELATED AWESOMENESS I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IN 2013: "Revolution" coming back in March. Frankly, I haven't caught too much new stuff this year.
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